Its such a strange feeling to feel "settled"- its weird because its supposedly what I always wanted but now that I have it, I'm not sure its so great anymore. When I was in school, there would be so much change going on- different classes, classmates, internships, settings- there was always something to look forward to, always anticipating change. Now I have a job that I see as permanent, I am moving out at the end of this month and then that's it. Is that it? I cannot imagine what the next change I can look forward to is and that slightly frightens me. Welcome to adult life Vee. It's almost sad to feel settled and strange to have to think of ways of creating and planning change for myself. Maybe in like half a years time or so I will figure out this new lifestyle and find ways of not getting bored. On the other hand, I'm excited to finally have opportunities to start crossing things off of my bucket list.
Last Sunday's youth sermon was truly convicting. And not just a "yeah, that was important" type of convicting, but really a "wow, I need to change my whole perspective and really hit the root issue here, truly repent and ask God to change my heart in this regard" type of convicting. The whole time I felt as though the sermon had been specially crafted for me- to really get me to analyze my own heart and realize how little I love the people that are truly my brothers and sisters. By nature I love to critique everything- I always thought it would be awesome to have a career where I get to criticize companies or stores and tell them what they are doing wrong. Unfortunately my sinful nature brings this into the way I deal with people. As I was listening to the sermon I realized that judging people was just my default setting. In my own head, to myself, I always concealed this as honest assessment or analyzing- instead of downright, sinful judging. When I would be c